when it came to guys, i was able to make deals with myself by seeing them through a blinded lense of youth and innocence. i was able to focus on only the attractive, unique, or good aspects of their personalities or looks, so other things didn't seem so important. e.g. he's such a good listener. he's very loyal....oh but his eyebrows are so dense and full of intellectual prowess...
now, i can only see through a microscopic lense that first finds faults and weaknesses in people.
10 years ago, if the dating game had been a game of Deal or No Deal, i would have opened maybe three shiny cases and succumbed to the banker on the other end of the line, satisfied with a mediocre package. but now, my greed and self absorption don't allow me to settle for any deals or for any cases, no matter how risky it seems to pass them up. instead, i deny myself opportunities, determined to win the biggest prize that I will allow myself to settle for.
the question is: is there enough behind all that silver to even satiate my growing greed? or will nothing make me happy?.....
i think one day you're going to find yourself opening a shiny silver case only to find pure gold inside. then you'll say to yourself, "this is the best decision i've ever made." while he says the exact same thing.
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