behind the seens

"There is no great with Thee, there is no small,

      For Thou are all, and fillest all in all."

today, i had a newfound appreciation for people who work tirelessly backstage - they truly function as the steel underbelly of the ship, keeping it balanced and afloat beneath the waterline.

i don't envy these types so much as i respect and am in awe of their servant hearts. these "backies" (backstagers) tend to be humble in character and they make maximal sacrifices for minimal glory. mad respect! your houses in heaven will be filled with treasures galore! =]

watching them work with diligence and joy reminds me of the attitude of Jesus Christ, who became so incredibly lowly so that others could be elevated.

of course, i won't sit here and mourn about why i can't be such a person because after years of laborious grumbling, i came to recognize that God has made us all uniquely. and there are certain ways that people are called to be unavoidably visible. it's a blessing and a curse because with such platforms come responsibilities and opportunities to lead and witness with action, conviction, and genuineness. and so, i also respect those who carry much in the limelight and still represent Christ and their industries well (i.e., Tebow). of course, the backstagers make these spotlighters look and sound excellent! hehe

on the flip side, i also recognize that i need to show more patience, grace, and love to the people that i perceive as glory hogs, humble braggers, and recognition fiends. i'm hypersensitive to it and i find it hard to encourage and affirm them, no matter how good the things they do are.... this is another way that i am very self-absorbed  because i myself, have this deep insecurity and paranoia that people may think this very thing of me, that i am vainglorious and lover of the limelight. well, tears of a clown... i don't ask for the attention so much as i just can't control or hide my flamboyant nature! ....gosh, i need more healing!

Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven....  do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. -Matthew 6:1;4

Fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell -Matthew 10:28